Christmas Gifts

Christmas is not about the gifts, or is it?  Every year, as December 25th approaches, I hear some form of the statement “Christmas is not about the gifts”.  There are several articles addressing the subject.  Here are some of the titles I found:

Six Reasons not to give Gifts this Christmas.

Nine Fool Proof Excuses for not Buying Christmas Gifts

Christmas is about Christ, not Gifts

Christmas with no Presents

Let’s not Mall each other this Christmas    

Often, when people make ‘the statement”, they are protesting the commercialization of Christmas.   Some feel pressure to spend money they simply don’t have. Some enjoy the gift giving, but the drive to find ‘the perfect gift’ is overwhelming.  Some stress because their gift list is full of extended family members they hardly even know. Others resent buying gifts because they are only giving to keep from feeling guilty.  (If you give me or my family members a gift, and I don’t give one too, then I feel bad.)

In light of the inward or outward pressure many feel about gifts, it is understandable so many would say “Christmas is not about the gifts.”   Yet, I must strongly challenge this view because:

Christmas in many ways is precisely about the gifts!

Obviously, Christmas is not about the gifts we can accumulate.  It’s not about the perfect tie or the new television or any other material things we may desire or receive. It’s not about the excess much of our culture has come to expect.   Christmas is Christmas because of the greatest gift ever given to the world! God unselfishly sent His perfect son into an imperfect world with one mission in mind:  To redeem mankind!  

       

God did not send Jesus into the world out of obligation.  Neither did He send Jesus into the world because we deserved his help.  Mankind did not deserve or appreciate ‘the Gift’. 

For God so greatly loved and dearly prized the world that He even gave up His only begotten Son, so that whoever believes in (trusts in, clings to, relies on) Him shall not perish (come to destruction, be lost) but have eternal (everlasting) life.  (John 3:16 AMP)  We have Christmas today, because of God’s love. 

There is no better way to honor the most important arrival the world has ever known than to pay it forward.  This year let’s make Christmas about the gift of love.  Here’s my Christmas prayer:

           

God help every gift I give to be motivated by love.  May every present I share be wrapped in love.  Help me to be wise enough not to allow presents to become more important than giving time and attention to those I love. And may I gracefully receive gifts from others instead of making it all about me.  Help me to appreciate the love others give me and not to compete or complicate the simplicity of the meaning of Christmas.  In Jesus name I pray, amen.  

Merry Christmas!  

How do you Measure your Church?

            Probably all of us, particularly ministers sometimes measure our church by factors such as attendance, finances or the amount of programs we offer. Truthfully, these factors should not be ignored.  However, we must be careful not to judge the fruit of our church solely based on these factors.  As a pastor in a small community, I must admit, more than once I’ve been discouraged over programs we cannot offer, and money we cannot give. 

            Recently, through a letter from a new church member I was reminded that while growth, finances and programs are important, there is a much more important factor in our church.  If we have this factor we will be effective regardless of size or programs.  If we don’t have this factor, we will be limited no matter how large or how many programs we offer.  I  call it the ‘grace factor’.  Do you and your church show grace, or do you just talk about it?    

Despite the fact that I have taught and directed children's ministry, led middle school Bible classes, and taught adult Sunday School lessons, I have never experienced something more intimidating and exhausting than stepping foot into a new church.  Even as an experienced church-goer and teacher, I still feel so much anxiety going to church now that I have three young children of my own.  As I look around, I read the expressions of others:  "Are my children an inconvenience?  Are we a model-enough family to be accepted?  Do they think I'm an awful mother who has no control of my children, or do they think I'm a control freak?  Do these people even WANT us here?"

After moving to the area we had a few very tough experiences at finding a church home.  We were told our children would need to be better to participate in certain programs.  Some people incorrectly assumed that I was a single mother.  Others have judged that since my husband is with me only some of the time, that he's not a faithful man of God (even though he ministers to others at his job site on the other side of the world).  I totally understand this line of thought because, at one time, I also found it easy to judge others based upon what I saw.  I believe God gave me children, along with these recent experiences, to realize how profound grace can be. 

When we first started searching for a church, I wanted to have children's ministry programs, Sunday School classes, Wednesday night services - everything that was on my checklist for church.  But something significant was missing.  I just didn't feel at home anywhere that had all the programs I wanted. It was so difficult to look for a church with my husband gone half the time.  And I wept from the heart-breaking experiences I'd had within some of the churches we'd attended. I was lonely and didn't have the local church family I needed to feel like I belonged in this community.  To be honest, I was completely ready to give up. If I had not been part of the more experienced "churched" crowd, or if I had not been a mature enough Christian to realize the blessing I would miss out on if I did not find a church home, I probably would have given up.  

But then we entered the doors of a church where smiles were on the faces of the members of the congregation.  A place where people held conversations with me - people who did not talk down to me when I was there alone with three children, people who showed me that they took pleasure in having us there, REGARDLESS of how my children acted (or how I acted, for that matter!).  And ultimately, just ordinary people in this body of believers would kneel down to look into the face of my children and show them love. I was overcome with emotions just watching it.  And I finally realized... children's ministry is not just what "programs" a church offers. A church can minister to children if they just show them love and patience and kindness and grace.  And when you minister to children, you minister to their parents.

This experience by itself was enough to give me the encouragement I needed to keep trying.  But, in addition to the fact that my children and I were finally accepted and loved unconditionally, when people found out about our family dynamics, they started giving selflessly of themselves.  Church members stepped up to take my youngest to the nursery so that I could worship fully without distraction.  Others offered to help with the children when I needed it while my husband was gone. The pastors cared for my children (more than once!) so that I could have some fellowship time with other women.  After my husband had left for the Philippines, a couple even met my children and I at a restaurant to spend time getting to know us better.  That same couple offered to take care of the children one evening so that my husband could go on a date when he returned! AND THEN they said they wanted to make it a tradition! These are my face-of-grace moments.  (And there are so many more… )

Churched?  Or unchurched?  What does that mean, anyway?  Are we expressing love and joy to those who come into our midst, or are we shutting the door on them simply by the look on our face?  I can tell you, nothing has been as graceful to me as the love that was on the faces of the people attending Carthage Full Gospel Church.  I am deeply moved by the love I've experienced but am also humbled by it.  It makes me want to be a more gracious person just being around you.  The old adage "We lead by example" is so true.  Thank you for teaching me how to be the face of grace to others.

Psalm 115:15,

Brandy

Penny for Your Contentment?

I recently read about a child that wanted a Happy Meal because of the toy it contained.  Her parents said no, that the toy was cheap and only made the meal higher. 

The little girl really wanted the toy, so she began to beg.  When saying please ten times did not work, she resorted to more desperate measures:  She began to bargain.  “Please mom and dad.   I want this Happy Meal and toy more than I ever wanted anything before.  If you will let me have it, I won’t ask for anything for a long time, maybe never again.  I’ll quit complaining when you ask me to clean my room. Also, I’ll be happy and content for the rest of my life.”  

Only a child would believe a Happy Meal toy would make them happy.  Right?   “Only a child could be foolish enough to believe that a change in circumstance could bring lasting contentment.  Or maybe not.  Maybe when you get older, you don’t necessarily get any smarter; your Happy Meals just get more expensive.”  (John Ortberg)

In America, it seems most people live in a constant state of discontentment.  Do any of these sound familiar to you?

“If I had a better house, I’d be happy.” 

“If I had a girlfriend, I’d be happy.”

“If I had a boyfriend, I’d be happy.”

“If I had the right spouse, I’d be happy.”

“If I had no spouse, I’d be happy.”

“If I had a larger bank account, I’d be happy.”

“If I had kids, I’d be happy.

“If my kids were grown, I’d be happy.”

“If my kids were small again, I’d be happy.”

“If I had a certain car, I’d be happy.”

The list goes on and on, but the happiness seems to never come, at least not for very long.   Could it be that things cannot bring contentment? 

The apostle Paul said, “I have learned how to be content (satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed or disquieted) in whatever state I am… I am self-sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency.”  (Phil. 4:11-13 Amp) 

When discontentment leads us to seek the Lord, it is not a bad thing.   Finding our sufficiency in Christ will lead us to a life of contentment, joy and peace.

However, when we seek to have our discontentment overcome through things or other people, we like Eve, will partake of forbidden fruit.  When she saw the fruit was delightful to look at, and to be desired to make one wise, she ate it.

How can we find contentment in a world of discontentment?

Contentment is found in peace.  One of the over seventy words used to describe the Hebrew word for peace (Shalom) is contentment.  Contentment is the result of a heart at peace!  

Peace is a gift, but it must be received.  We receive the gift of God’s peace through relationship with Jesus, through knowledge of who Jesus is, and through trusting in Jesus as the one who has already given us all need to live a fulfilled life.     “You will guard him and keep him in perfect and constant peace whose mind [both its inclination and its character] is stayed on You, because he commits himself to You, leans on You, and hopes confidently in You.” 

Ultimately, we choose to receive the gift of peace, or we choose to pursue satisfaction from some other source besides God.  Peace brings contentment, but all other sources will ultimately leave us unfulfilled and dissatisfied.   Will you choose to live in the tent of contentment or the tent of discontentment?  The choice is yours.